“If she wasn’t such a sweet, darling thing, she’d be impossible,” thought Scarlett ruefully, realizing that she had a child with a will equal to her own. “She adores Rhett and he could make her behave better if he wanted to.”
But Rhett showed no inclination to make Bonnie behave. Whatever she did was right and if she wanted the moon she could have it, if he could reach it for her. His pride in her beauty, her curls, her dimples, her graceful little gestures was boundless. He loved her pertness, her high spirits and the quaint sweet manner she had of showing her love for him. For all her spoiled and willful ways she was such a lovable child that he lacked the heart to try to curb her. He was her god, the center of her small world, and that was too precious for him to risk losing by reprimands.
“如果她不是这样一个可爱的宝贝,她也就吃不开了,"思嘉郁郁不乐地想,也明白她的孩子原来和她自己一样倔强。“她崇拜瑞德,要是他愿意的话,是完全可以让她变好的。"
可是瑞德没有表示要教育孩子学好的意思。她做什么都是对的,她要月亮就给月亮,如果他能去摘下来的话。他对她的美貌,她的鬈发,她的酒窝,她的优美的姿势,无不感到骄傲。他爱她的淘气,爱她的兴高采烈,以及她用以表示爱他的那种奇特而美妙的样子。尽管她有骄惯和任性的地方,但她毕竟是那样可爱的一个孩子,他怎么能忍心去约束她呢!他是她心目的上帝,是她小小世界的中心,这对他实在太宝贵了,他决不敢冒丧失这一地位的危险去训斥她。
She clung to him like a shadow. She woke him earlier than he cared to wake, sat beside him at the table, eating alternately from his plate and her own, rode in front of him on his horse and permitted no one but Rhett to undress her and put her to sleep in the small bed beside his.
It amused and touched Scarlett to see the iron hand with which her small child ruled her father. Who would have thought that Rhett, of all people, would take fatherhood so seriously? But sometimes a dart of jealousy went through Scarlett because Bonnie, at the age of four, understood Rhett better than she had ever understood him and could manage him better than she had ever managed him.
她总像影子似的紧跟着他。早晨,他还不想起来时她就把他叫醒;吃饭时坐在他旁边,轮换地吃着他和她自己碟子里的东西;骑马出门时坐在他面前的鞍头上;晚上睡觉时只让瑞德给脱衣服,把她抱到他旁边的小床上去。
思嘉眼看自己的女儿用一又小手牢牢地控制着她的父亲,心里又高兴又感动。有谁能像瑞德这样一条汉子,做起父亲来竟会如此严肃而认真呢?不过,有时候思嘉也心怀妒忌,痛苦不堪,因为邦妮刚刚四岁,却比她更加了解瑞德,更能驾驭他。
“Wait till she’s old enough to hunt,” he boasted. There’ll be no one like her on any field. I’ll take her to Virginia then. That’s where the real hunting is. And Kentucky where they appreciate good riders.”
When it came to making her riding habit, as usual she had her choice of colors and as usual chose blue.
“But, my darling! Not that blue velvet! The blue velvet is for a party dress for me,” laughed Scarlett. “A nice black broadcloth is what little girls wear.” Seeing the small black brows coming together: “For Heaven’s sake, Rhett, tell her how unsuitable it would be and how dirty it will get.”
“Oh, let her have the blue velvet. If it gets dirty, we’ll make her another one,” said Rhett easily.
“等着瞧吧,到她可以打猎了的时候,准保世界上哪个猎手也不如她呢,"瑞德夸口说。"那时我要带她弗吉尼亚去,那里才是真正打猎的地方。还有肯塔基,骑马就得到那里去。"
等到要给她做骑马服时,照样又得由她自己挑选颜色,而且她照例又挑上了天蓝色的。
“不过,宝贝!还是不要用这种蓝丝绒吧!蓝丝绒是我参加衬交活动时穿的呢,“思嘉笑着说。"小姑娘最好穿黑府绸的。"这时她看见那两道小小的黑眉已经皱起来了,便赶紧说:“瑞德,看在上帝面上,你告诉她那种料子对她多么不合适,而且还很容易脏呀!"
“唔,就让她做蓝丝绒的。要是弄脏了,我们就给她再做一件,“瑞德轻松地说。
After the first week, Bonnie begged for a higher bar, a bar that was a foot and a half from the ground.
“When you are six years old,” said Rhett. “Then you’ll be big enough for a higher jump and I’ll buy you a bigger horse. Mr. Butler’s legs aren’t long enough.”
“They are, too, I jumped Aunt Melly’s rose bushes and they are ‘normously high!”
“No, you must wait,” said Rhett, firm for once. But the firmness gradually faded away before her incessant importunings and tantrums.
“Oh, all right,” he said with a laugh one morning and moved the narrow white cross bar higher. “If you fall off, don’t cry and blame me!”
过了一个星期,邦妮要求将栏杆升高些,升到离地一英尺半。
“你到你六岁的时候吧,"瑞德说。"那时你能跳得更高了,我还要给你买匹大些的马。'巴特勒先生'的腿不够长呢。"
“够长。我已经跳过媚兰姑姑家的玫瑰丛了,那高得很呢!”
“不,你还得等等,"瑞德说,这回总算表现得坚定些。可是这坚定在她不停的恳求和怒吼下又渐渐消失了。
“唔,好吧,"有天早晨他笑着说,同时把那根窄窄的白色横杆挪高一些。"你要是掉下来,可别哭鼻子骂我呀!"
“Mother!” screamed Bonnie, turning her head up toward Scarlett’s bedroom. “Mother! Watch me! Daddy says I can!”
Scarlett, who was combing her hair, came to the window and smiled down at the tiny excited figure, so absurd in the soiled blue habit.
“I really must get her another habit,” she thought. “Though Heaven only knows how I’ll make her give up that dirty one.”
“Mother, watch!”
“I’m watching dear,” said Scarlett smiling.
“妈!"邦妮抬起头来朝思嘉的卧室尖叫着。“妈!快看呀!爹爹说我能跳啦!”
思嘉正在梳头,听见女儿喊叫便走到窗口,微笑着俯视这个兴奋的小家伙,她穿着那件已沾满了尘土的天蓝色骑马服,模样可真怪。
“我真的得给她再另做一件了,'她心里想。"天知道我怎样才能说服她丢掉这件脏的埃”
“妈,你看!"
“我在看着呢,亲爱的,"思嘉微笑着说。
As Rhett lifted the child and set her on the pony, Scarlett called with a swift rush of pride at the straight back and the proud set of the head,
“You’re mighty pretty, precious!”
“So are you,” said Bonnie generously and, hammering a heel into Mr. Butler’s ribs, she galloped down the yard toward the arbor.
“Mother, watch me take this one!” she cried, laying on the crop.
Watch me take this one!
瑞德将孩子举起来,让她骑在小马上,这时思嘉瞧着她那挺直的腰背和昂起的头,顿时从心底涌起一股自豪感,不禁大声喊道:
“你真漂亮极了,我的宝贝!”
“你也一样呢,”邦妮慷慨地回赞她一句,一面用脚跟在"巴特勒先生"的肋上狠狠一蹬,便向凉亭那边飞跑过去了。
“妈,你瞧我这一下吧!"她大喊一声,一面抽着鞭子。
瞧我这一下吧!
Memory rang a bell far back in Scarlett’s mind. There was something ominous about those words. What was it? Why couldn’t she remember? She looked down at her small daughter, so lightly poised on the galloping pony and her brow wrinkled as a chill swept swiftly through her breast. Bonnie came on with a rush, her crisp black curls jerking, her blue eyes blazing.
“They are like Pa’s eyes,” thought Scarlett, “Irish blue eyes and she’s just like him in every way.”
And, as she thought of Gerald, the memory for which she had been rumbling came to her swiftly, came with the heart stopping clarity of summer lightning, throwing, for an instant, a whole countryside into unnatural brightness. She could hear an Irish voice singing, hear the hard rapid pounding of hooves coming up the pasture hill at Tara, hear a reckless voice, so like the voice of her child: “Ellen! Watch me take this one!”
记忆在思嘉心灵的深处隐隐发出回响。这句话里似乎有点不祥的意味。那是什么呀?难道她记不起来了?她俯视着她的小女儿那么轻盈地坐在飞奔的小马上,这时一丝凄冷突然掠过她的胸坎。邦妮猛冲过来,她那波翻浪涌般的鬈发在头上螦动着,天蓝色的眼睛闪闪发亮。
“这像爸的眼睛,爱尔兰人的蓝眼睛,"思嘉心想,"而且她在无论哪个方面都像他呢。”
她一想起杰拉尔德,那正在苦苦搜索的记忆便像令人心悸的夏日闪电般霍然出现,立即把一整幅乡村景色照得雪亮了。她听得见一个爱尔兰嗓音在歌唱,听得见从塔拉疾驰而来的马蹄声,听得见一个跟她的孩子很相像的鲁莽的呼喊:“爱伦,瞧我这一下吧!"
“No!” she cried. “No! Oh, Bonnie, stop!”
Even as she leaned from the window there was a fearful sound of splintering wood, a hoarse cry from Rhett, a melee of blue velvet and flying hooves on the ground. Then Mr. Butler scrambled to his feet and trotted off with an empty saddle.
On the third night after Bonnie’s death, Mammy waddled slowly up the kitchen steps of Melanie’s house. She was dressed in black from her huge men’s shoes, slashed to permit freedom for her toes, to her black head rag. Her blurred old eyes were bloodshot and red rimmed, and misery cried out in every line of her mountainous figure. Her face was puckered in the sad bewilderment of an old ape but there was determination in her jaw.
“不!"她大声喊道,"不!唔,邦妮,你别跳了!"
正当她探身向窗口望时,一种可怕的木杆折裂声,瑞德的吼叫声,以及一堆蓝丝绒和飞奔的马蹄猝然坍倒在地上的声响,便同时传来了。然后,“巴特勒先生"挣扎着爬起来,驮着一个空马鞍迅速地跑开了。
邦妮死后第三个晚上,嬷嬷蹒跚着慢慢走上媚兰家厨房的台阶。她全身都是黑的,从一双脚尖剪开了的大男鞋到她的黑色头帕都是黑的。她那双模糊的老眼里布满了血丝,眼圈也红了,整个笨重的身躯几乎每处都流露出痛苦的神情。她那张皱脸孔,像只惶惑不安的老猴似的,不过那下颚却说明她心中早已打定了主意。
She spoke a few soft words to Dilcey who nodded kindly, as though an unspoken armistice existed in their old feud. Dilcey put down the supper dishes she was holding and went quietly through the pantry toward the dining room. In a minute Melanie was in the kitchen, her table napkin in her hand, anxiety in her face.
“Miss Scarlet isn’t—”
“Miss Scarlett bearin’ up, same as allus,” said Mammy heavily. “Ah din’ ten ter ‘sturb yo’ supper, Miss Melly. Ah kin wait tell you thoo ter tell you whut Ah got on mah mine.”
“Supper can wait,” said Melanie. “Dilcey, serve the rest of the supper. Mammy, come with me.”
她对迪尔茜轻轻说了几句,迪尔茜亲切地点点头,仿佛她们之间那多年以来的争斗就这样默默地休战了。迪尔茜放下手中的晚餐盘碟,悄悄地穿过餐具室向饭厅走去。不一会儿,媚兰来到了厨房里,她手里还拿着餐巾,满脸焦急的神色。
“思嘉小姐不是-”
“思嘉小姐倒是平静了,跟平常一样,"嬷嬷沮丧的说。“我本来不想打搅你吃晚饭,媚兰小姐。可是我等不及了,要把我压在心里的话跟你说说呢。"
“晚饭可以等一会儿再吃嘛,"媚兰说。"迪尔茜,你去给别的人开饭吧。嬷嬷,跟我来。"
Melanie led the way to the small book-lined sitting room, shut the door and motioned Mammy to the sofa.
“I was going over right after supper,” she said. “Now that Captain Butler’s mother has come, I suppose the funeral will be tomorrow morning.”
“De fune’l. Dat’s jes’ it,” said Mammy. “Miss Melly, we’s all in deep trouble an’ Ah’s come ter you fer he’p. Ain’ nuthin’ but weery load, honey, nuthin’ but weery load.”
媚兰领路走进那间四壁全是书籍的起居室,关好门,推着嬷嬷在沙发上坐下。
“我准备吃过晚饭就马上过来的,"她说。"既然巴特勒船长的母亲已经来了,我想明天早晨就会下葬了吧。"
"下葬吗,正是这个问题呀,"嬷嬷说。"媚兰小姐,我们都弄得没有一点主意了,我就是来求你帮忙呢。这世止事事都叫人心烦,亲爱的,事事都叫人心烦啊!”
“Has Miss Scarlett collapsed?” questioned Melanie worriedly. “I’ve hardly seen her since Bonnie— She has been in her room and Captain Butler has been out of the house and—”
Suddenly tears began to flow down Mammy’s black face. Melanie sat down beside her and patted her arm and, after a moment, Mammy lifted the hem of her black skirt and dried her eyes.
“You got ter come he’p us, Miss Melly. Ah done de bes’ Ah kin but it doan do no good.”
“Miss Scarlett—”
Mammy straightened.
“Miss Melly, you knows Miss Scarlett well’s Ah does. Whut dat chile got ter stan’, de good Lawd give her strent ter stan’. Disyere done broke her heart but she kin stan’ it. It’s Mist’ Rhett Ah come ‘bout.”
“I have so wanted to see him but whenever I’ve been there, he has either been downtown or locked in his room with— And Scarlett has looked like a ghost and wouldn’t speak— Tell me quickly, Mammy. You know I’ll help if I can.”
Mammy wiped her nose on the back of her hand. “Ah say Miss Scarlett kin stan’ whut de Lawd sen’, kase she done had ter stan’ a-plen’y, but Mist’ Rhett— Miss Melly, he ain’ never had ter stan’ nuthin’ he din’ wanter stan’, not nuthin’. It’s him Ah come ter see you ‘bout.”
“媚兰小姐,你和我一样了解思嘉小姐嘛。那孩子到了该忍住的时候,上帝就给她力量叫她经受得起了。这件事伤透了她的心,可她经得祝我是为了瑞德先生才来的呀。"
“我每次到那里,都很想见到他,可他要么进城去了,要么就锁在自己房里,跟-至于思嘉,她像个幽灵似的,一句话也不说-快告诉我,嬷嬷。你知道,只要我做得到,我是会帮忙的。"
嬷嬷用手背擦了擦鼻子。“我说思嘉小姐无论碰到什么事都经得住,因为她经受得多了。可是瑞德先生呢,媚兰小姐,他从没经受过他不愿经受的事,一次也没有。就是为了他,我才来找你。"
“But—”
“Miss Melly, you got ter come home wid me, dis evenin’.” There was urgency in Mammy’s voice. “Maybe Mist’ Rhett lissen ter you. He allus did think a heap of yo’ ‘pinion.”
“Oh, Mammy, what is it? What do you mean?”
Mammy squared her shoulders.
“Miss Melly, Mist’ Rhett done—done los’ his mine. He woan let us put Lil Miss away.”
“不过-"
“媚兰小姐,今儿晚上你一定得跟我一起回去呀。"嬷嬷的口气非常迫切。"说不定瑞德先生会听你的呢。他一向是尊重你的意见的。"
“唔,嬷嬷,到底是怎么回事呀?你指的是什么呢?"
嬷嬷挺起胸来。
“媚兰小姐,瑞德先生已经-已经疯了。他不让我们把小姑娘抬走呢。”
“Lost his mind? Oh, Mammy, no!”
“Ah ain’ lyin’. It’s de Gawd’s truff. He ain’ gwine let us buhy dat chile. He done tole me so hisseff, not mo’n an hour ago.”
“But he can’t—he isn’t—”
“Dat’s huccome Ah say he los’ his mine.”
“But why—”
“疯了?啊,嬷嬷,不会的!"
“我没有撒谎,这是千真万确的事。他不会让我们埋葬那孩子。他刚才亲口对我说了,还没超过一个钟头呢。"
“可是他不能-他不是-"
“所以我才说他疯了嘛。"
“但是为什么-"
Again the tears began to fall but this time Mammy did not even wipe them away.
“But w’en she come to, she go inter de room whar he setin’, holin’ Miss Bonnie, an’ she say: ‘Gimme mah baby whut you kilt.’ ”
“Oh, no! She couldn’t!”
“Yas’m. Dat whut she say. She say: ‘You kilt her.’ An’ Ah felt so sorry fer Mist’ Rhett Ah bust out cryin’, kase he look lak a whup houn’. An’ Ah say: ‘Give dat chile ter its mammy. Ah ain’ gwine have no sech goin’s on over mah Lil Miss.’ An’ Ah tek de chile away frum him an’ tek her inter her room an’ wash her face. An’ Ah hear dem talkin’ an’ it lak ter tuhn mah blood cole, whut dey say. Miss Scarlett wuz callin’ him a mudderer fer lettin’ her try ter jump dat high, an’ him sayin’ Miss Scarlett hadn’ never keered nuthin’ ‘bout Miss Bonnie nor none of her chillun. ...”
嬷嬷又开始在流泪,不过这一次她索性不擦了。
“可当她醒过来后,到那房里一看,发现他抱着邦妮坐在那里,便说:'还我的女儿,她是你害死的!'"
“啊,不!她不能这样说!"
“是呀,小姐,她就是那样说的。她说:'是你害死了她。'我真替瑞德先生难过,我也哭了,因为他那模样实在太可怜。我说:'把那孩子交给她嬷嬷吧。我不忍心让小小姐再这样下去呀。'我把孩子从他怀里抱过来将她放到她自己房里,给她洗脸,这时我听见他们在说话,那些话叫我听了血都凉了。思嘉小姐骂他是杀人犯,因为让孩子去跳那么高的栏给摔死了,而他说思嘉小姐从来不关心邦妮小姐和她的另外两个孩子……"
“Stop, Mammy! Don’t tell me any more. It isn’t right for you to tell me this!” cried Melanie, her mind shrinking away from the picture Mammy’s words evoked.
“Ah knows Ah got no bizness tellin’ you, but mah heart too full ter know jes’ whut not ter say. Den he tuck her ter de unnertaker’s hisseff an’ he bring her back an’ he put her in her baid in his room. An’ w’en Miss Scarlett say she b’long in de pahlor in de coffin, Ah thought Mist’ Rhett gwine hit her. An’ he say, right cole lak: ‘She b’long in mah room.’ An’ he tuhn ter me an’ he say: ‘Mammy, you se dat she stay right hyah tell Ah gits back.’ Den he light outer de house on de hawse an’ he wuz gone tell ‘bout sundown. W’en he come t’arin’ home, Ah seed dat he’d been drinkin’ an’ drinkin’ heavy, but he wuz cahyin’ it well’s usual. He fling inter de house an’ not even speak ter Miss Scarlett or Miss Pitty or any of de ladies as wuz callin’, but he fly up de steps an’ th’ow open de do’ of his room an’ den he yell for me. W’en Ah comes runnin’ as fas’ as Ah kin, he wuz stan’in’ by de baid an’ it wuz so dahk in de room Ah couldn’ sceercely see him, kase de shutters wuz done drawed."
“An’ he say ter me, right fierce lak: ‘Open dem shutters. It’s dahk in hyah.’ An’ Ah fling dem open an’ he look at me an’, fo’ Gawd, Miss Melly, mah knees ‘bout give way, kase he look so strange. Den he say: Bring lights. Bring lots of lights. An’ keep dem buhnin’. An’ doan draw no shades an’ no shutters. Doan you know Miss Bonnie’s fraid of de dahk?”
Melanie’s horror struck eyes met Mammy’s and Mammy nodded ominously.
“Dat’s whut he say. ‘Miss Bonnie’s ‘fraid of de dahk.’ ”
Mammy shivered.
“这时他气冲冲地对我说:'把百叶窗打开,这里太黑了。'我马上打开窗子,发现他正瞧着我,而且,天哪,媚兰小姐,他那模样多古怪呀,吓得我连膝头都打颤了。接着他说:'拿灯来,多拿些灯来!把它们全都点上。不要关窗帘或百叶窗,难道你不知道邦妮小姐怕黑吗?'”
媚兰那双惊恐的眼睛跟嬷嬷的眼睛互相看了看,嬷嬷不住地点点头。
“他就是这样说的。'邦妮小姐怕黑。'”
嬷嬷不由得哆嗦起来。
“An’ den, dis evenin’,” Mammy paused and again wiped her nose on her hand. “Dis evenin’ Miss Scarlett ketch him in de upstairs hall w’en he come in, an’ she go in de room wid him an’ she say: ‘De fune’l set fer termorrer mawnin’.’ An’ he say: ‘Do dat an’ Ah kills you termorrer.’ ”
“Oh, he must have lost his mind!”
“Yas’m. An’ den dey talks kinder low an’ Ah doan hear all whut dey say, ‘cept he say agin ‘bout Miss Bonnie bein’ sceered of de dahk an’ de grabe pow’ful dahk. An’ affer aw’ile, Miss Scarlett say ‘You is a fine one ter tek on so, affer killin’ her ter please yo’ pride.’ An’ he say: ‘Ain’ you got no mercy?’ An’ she say: ‘No. An’ Ah ain’ got no chile, needer. An’ Ah’m wo’out wid de way you been ackin’ sence Bonnie wuz kilt. You is a scan’al ter de town. You been drunk all de time an’ ef you doan think Ah knows whar you been spendin’ yo’ days, you is a fool. Ah knows you been down ter dat creeter’s house, dat Belle Watling.’ ”
“这样,到今天傍晚,"嬷嬷说着又停顿一下,用手擦了擦鼻子。"今天傍晚,他回来时,思嘉小姐在楼道里碰到了他,便跟他一起到房里去,并对他说:'葬礼定在明天上午举行。'他说:‘你要敢这样,我明天就宰了你。'"
“啊,他一定是疯了!"
“是的,小姐。接着他们谈话的声音低了些,我没有全听清楚,只听见他又在说邦妮小姐怕黑,而坟墓里黑极了。过了一会儿,思嘉小姐说,'你倒好,把孩子害死了以后,为了表白自己,却装起好心来了。'他说:'你真的不能宽恕我吗?'她说:'不能。而且你害死邦妮以后所干的那些勾当我早就厌恶极了。全城的人都会唾骂你。你整天酗酒,并且,你要是以为我不知道你在哪里鬼混,那你就太愚蠢了。我知道你是到那个贱货家去了,到贝尔。沃特琳那里去了。'"
“Oh, Mammy, no!”
“Yas’m. Dat whut she said. An’, Miss Melly, it’s de truff. Niggers knows a heap of things quicker dan w’ite folks, an’ Ah knowed dat’s whar he been but Ah ain’ said nuthin’ ‘bout it An’ he doan deny it He say: ‘Yas’m, dat’s whar Ah been an’ you neen tek on, kase you doan give a damn. A bawdy house is a haben of refuge affer dis house of hell. An’ Belle is got one of de worl’s kines’ hearts. She doan th’ow it up ter me dat Ah done kilt mah chile.’ ”
“啊,嬷嬷,不会的。”
“可这是真的,小姐。她就是这样说的。并且,媚兰小姐,这是事实。我黑人对许多事情知道得比白人要快。我也知道他是到那个地方去了,不过没有说罢了。而且他也并不否认。他说:'是呀,太太我正是到那里去了,你也用不着这样伤心,因为你觉得这并不要紧嘛。走出这个地狱般的家,而那个下流地方便成了避难的天堂呢。何况贝尔是世界上心肠最好的女人。她决不指责我说我害死了自己的孩子呢。'"
“Oh,” cried Melanie, stricken to the heart.
Her own life was so pleasant, so sheltered, so wrapped about with people who loved her, so full of kindness that what Mammy told her was almost beyond comprehension or belief. Yet there crawled into her mind a memory, a picture which she hastily put from her, as she would put from her the thought of another’s nudity. Rhett had spoken of Belle Watling the day he cried with his head on her knees. But he loved Scarlett. She could not have been mistaken that day. And of course, Scarlett loved him. What had come between them? How could a husband and a wife cut each other to pieces with such sharp knives?
“啊,“媚兰伤心地喊了一声。
她自己的生活是那么愉快,那么宁安,那么为周围的人所爱护,那么充满着相互间的真挚亲切关怀,因此她对于嬷嬷所说的一切简直难以理解,也无法相信,不过她心里隐隐记得一桩事情,一幅她急于要排除就好比不愿意想像别人裸体一样的情景,那就是那天瑞德把头伏在她膝上哭泣时谈起贝尔。沃特琳。可是他是爱思嘉的。那天她不可能对此产生误解。而且,思嘉也是爱他的。他们之间到底发生了什么龃龉呢?夫妻之间怎么这有这样毫不留情地相互残杀呢?
Mammy took up her story heavily.
“Affer a w’ile, Miss Scarlett come outer de room, w’ite as a sheet but her jaw set, an’ she see me stan’in’ dar an’ she say: ‘De fune’l be termorrer, Mammy.’ An’ she pass me by lak a ghos’. Den mah heart tuhn over, kase whut Miss Scarlett say, she mean. An’ whut Mist’ Rhett say, he mean too. An’ he say he kill her ef she do dat. Ah wuz plumb ‘stracted, Miss Melly, kase Ah done had sumpin’ on mah conscience all de time an’ it weighin’ me down. Miss Melly, it wuz me as sceered Lil Miss of de dahk.”
嬷嬷继续伤心地说下去。
“过了一会,思嘉小姐从房里出来,她的脸色煞白,但下颚咬得很紧。她看见我站在那里,便说:'嬷嬷,葬礼明天举行。'说罢就像个幽灵似的走了。那时我心里怦怦乱跳,因为思嘉小姐是说到就做到的。可瑞德先生也是说一不二的呀,而且他说过她要是那样干,他就要宰了她呢。我心里乱极了,媚兰小姐,因为我良心上一直压着一桩事再也忍受不住了。媚兰小姐,是我让小小姐在黑暗中受了惊呢。"
“Oh, but Mammy, it doesn’t matter—not now.”
“Yas’m, it do. Dat whut de whole trouble. An’ it come ter me Ah better tell Mist’ Rhett even ef he kill me, kase it on mah conscience. So Ah slip in de do’ real quick, fo’ he kin lock it, an’ Ah say: ‘Mist’ Rhett, Ah’s come ter confess.’ An’ he swung roun’ on me lak a crazy man an’ say: ‘Git!’ An’, fo’ Gawd, Ah ain’ never been so sceered! But Ah say: ‘Please, suh, Mist’ Rhett, let me tell you. It’s bout ter kill me. It wuz me as sceered Lil Miss of de dahk.’ An den, Miss Melly, Ah put mah haid down an’ waited fer him ter hit me. But he din’ say nuthin’. An’ Ah say: ‘Ah din’ mean no hahm. But, Mist’ Rhett, dat chile din’ have no caution an’ she wuzn’ sceered of nuthin’. An’ she wuz allus gittin’ outer baid affer eve’ybody sleep an’ runnin’ roun’ de house barefoot An’ it worrit me, kase Ah ‘fraid she hu’t herseff. So Ah tells her dar’s ghos’es an’ buggerboos in de dahk.’
“Ah goes downstairs an’ Ah gits ter thinkin’ dat he say dar ain’ gwine be no fune’l an’ Miss Scarlett say it be termorrer mawnin’ an’ he say dar be shootin’. An’ all de kinfolks in de house an’ all de neighbors already gabblin’ ‘bout it lak a flock of guinea hens, an’ Ah thought of you, Miss Melly. You got ter come he’p us.”
“Oh, Mammy, I couldn’t intrude!”
“Ef you kain, who kin?”
“But what could I do, Mammy?”
“Miss Melly, Ah doan know. But you kin do sumpin’. You kin talk ter Mist’ Rhett an’ maybe he lissen ter you. He set a gret sto’ by you, Miss Melly. Maybe you doan know it, but he do. Ah done hear him say time an’ agin, you is de onlies’ gret lady he knows.”
“我下楼来,一路想着他说的不要安葬,可思嘉小姐说明天上午举行葬礼,他又说要毙了她。弄得家里所有的人,还有左邻右舍,都在谈论这件事,这样我就想到了你。媚兰小姐。你一定得去帮我们一把。"
“唔!嬷嬷,我不能冒冒失失闯去呀!"
“要是你都不能,还有谁能呢?"
“可是我有什么办法,嬷嬷?"
“媚兰小姐,我也说不明白。但我认为你是能帮上忙的。你可以跟瑞德先生谈谈,也许他会听你的话。他一直很敬重你呢,媚兰小姐。也许你不知道,但他的确这样。我听他说过不止一次两次,说你是他所识的最伟大的女性呢。"
“But—”
Melanie rose to her feet, confused, her heart quailing at the thought of confronting Rhett. The thought of arguing with a man as grief crazed as the one Mammy depicted made her go cold. The thought of entering that brightly lighted room where lay the little girl she loved so much wrung her heart. What could she do? What could she say to Rhett that would ease his grief and bring him back to reason? For a moment she stood irresolute and through the closed door came the sound of her boy’s treble laughter. Like a cold knife in her heart came the thought of him dead. Suppose her Beau were lying upstairs, his little body cold and still, his merry laughter hushed.
“Oh,” she cried aloud, in fright, and in her mind she clutched him close to her heart. She knew how Rhett felt. If Beau were dead, how could she put him away, alone with the wind and the rain and the darkness?
“可是-"
媚兰站起来,真不知怎么办好,一想到要面对瑞德心里就发怵。一想到要跟一个像嬷嬷描述的那样悲痛得发疯的男人去理论,她浑身都凉了。一想到要进入那间照得通亮、里面躺着一个她多么喜爱的小姑娘的房子,她的心就难过极了。她怎么办呢?她能向瑞德说些什么才可以去缓解他的悲伤和恢复他的理智呢?她一时犹豫不定地站在那里,忽然从关着的门里传来她的孩子的欢快笑声,她猛地像一把刀子扎进心坎似的想起他要是死了呢?要是她的小博躺在楼上,小小的身躯凉了,僵了,他的笑声突然停止了呢?
“啊,"她惊恐地大叫一声,在心里把孩子紧紧抱祝她深深懂得瑞德的感情了。如果小博死了,她怎能把他抛开,让他孤零零的沦落在黑暗中,任凭风吹雨打啊!
“Oh! Poor, poor Captain Butler!” she cried. “I’ll go to him now, right away.”
She sped back to the dining room, said a few soft words to Ashley and surprised her little boy by hugging him close to her and kissing his blond curls passionately.
She left the house without a hat, her dinner napkin still clutched in her hand, and the pace she set was hard for Mammy’s old legs. Once in Scarlett’s front hall, she bowed briefly to the gathering in the library, to the frightened Miss Pittypat, the stately old Mrs. Butler, Will and Suellen. She went up the stairs swiftly, with Mammy panting behind her. For a moment, she paused before Scarlett’s closed door but Mammy hissed, “No’m, doan do dat.”
“啊,可怜的,可怜的巴特勒船长啊!"她喊道。"我现在就去看他,马上就去。”
她急忙回到饭厅,对艾希礼轻轻说了几句,然后紧紧搂了孩子一下,激动地吻了吻他的金色鬈发,这倒把孩子吓了一跳。
她帽子也没戴,餐巾还拿在手里,便走出家门,那迅疾的步子可叫嬷嬷的两条老腿难以跟上了。一连进思嘉家里前厅,她只向聚集在图书室里的人,向惊慌的皮蒂小姐和庄严的巴特勒老夫人,以及威尔和苏伦,匆匆地鞠躬致意,便径直上楼,让嬷嬷气喘吁叮地在背后跟着。她在思嘉紧闭的卧室门口停留了一会,但嬷嬷轻声说:“不,小姐,不要进去。"
Down the hall Melly went, more slowly now, and stopped in front of Rhett’s room. She stood irresolutely for a moment as though she longed to take flight. Then, bracing herself, like a small soldier going into battle, she knocked on the door and called softly: “Please let me in, Captain Butler. It’s Mrs. Wilkes. I want to see Bonnie.”
The door opened quickly and Mammy, shrinking back into the shadows of the hall, saw Rhett huge and dark against the blazing background of candles. He was swaying on his feet and Mammy could smell the whisky on his breath. He looked down at Melly for a moment and then, taking her by the arm, he pulled her into the room and shut the door.
Mammy edged herself stealthily to a chair beside the door and sank into it wearily, her shapeless body overflowing it. She sat still, weeping silently and praying. Now and then she lifted the hem of her dress and wiped her eyes. Strain her ears as hard as she might, she could hear no words from the room, only a low broken humming sound.
于是媚兰放慢步子走过穿堂,来到瑞德的门前站住了。她犹豫不定,仿佛想逃走似的。然后,她鼓起勇气,像个初次上阵的小兵,在门上敲了敲,并轻轻叫道:“请开门,巴特勒船长,我是威尔克斯太太。我要看看邦妮。"
门很快开了,嬷嬷畏缩着退到穿堂的阴影中,同时看见瑞德那衬托在明亮的烛光背景中的巨大黑影。他摇摇晃晃地站在那里,嬷嬷好像还闻到他呼吸中的威士忌酒气。他低头看了看媚兰,挽起她的胳臂把她带进屋里,然后把门关上了。
嬷嬷侧着身子偷偷挪动到门旁一把椅子跟前,将自己那胖得不成样子的身躯费劲地塞在里面。她静静地坐着,默默地哭泣和祈祷着,不时撩起衣襟来擦眼泪。她竭力侧耳细听,但听不清房里的话,只听到一些低低的断断续续的嗡嗡声。
After an interminable period, the door cracked open and Melly’s face white and strained, appeared.
“Bring me a pot of coffee, quickly, and some sandwiches.”
When the devil drove, Mammy could be as swift as a lithe black sixteen-year-old and her curiosity to get into Rhett’s room made her work faster. But her hope turned to disappointment when Melly merely opened the door a crack and took the tray. For a long time Mammy strained her sharp ears but she could distinguish nothing except the clatter of silver on china, and the muffled soft tones of Melanie’s voice. Then she heard the creaking of the bed as a heavy body fell upon it and, soon after, the sound of boots dropping to the floor. After an interval, Melanie appeared in the doorway but, strive though she might, Mammy could not see past her into the room. Melanie looked tired and there were tears glistening on her lashes but her face was serene again.
过了相当长一个时候,房门嘎的一声开了,媚兰那苍白而紧张的脸探了出来。
“请给我拿壶咖啡来,快一点,还要些三明治。"
一旦形势紧迫,嬷嬷是可以像个16岁的活泼黑人那样敏捷的,何况她很想到瑞德屋里去看看,所以行动起来就更迅速了。不过,她的希望破灭了,因为媚兰只把门开了一道缝,将盘子接过去又关了。于是,嬷嬷又侧耳细听了很久,但除了银餐具碰着瓷器的声音以及媚兰那模模糊糊的轻柔语调调外,仍然什么也听不清楚。后来她听见床架嘎吱一声响,显然有个沉重的身躯倒在床上,接着是靴子掉在地板上的声音。又过了一会,媚兰才出现在门口,但是嬷嬷无论怎样努力也没能越过她看见屋里的情景。媚兰显得很疲倦,眼睫毛上还闪着莹莹的泪花,不过脸色已平静了。
“Go tell Miss Scarlett that Captain Butler is quite willing for the funeral to take place tomorrow morning,” she whispered.
“Bress Gawd!” ejaculated Mammy. “How on uth—”
“Don’t talk so loud. He’s going to sleep. And, Mammy, tell Miss Scarlett, too, that I’ll be here all night and you bring me some coffee. Bring it here.”
“Ter disyere room?”
“Yes, I promised Captain Butler that if he would go to sleep I would sit up by her all night. Now go tell Miss Scarlett, so she won’t worry any more.”
“快去告诉思嘉小姐,巴特勒船长很愿意明天上午举行邦妮的葬礼,"她低声说。
“谢天谢地!"嬷嬷兴奋地喊道。"你究竟是怎么-"
“别这么大声说,他快要睡着了。还有,嬷嬷,告诉思嘉小姐,今晚我要整夜守在这里。你再给我去拿些咖啡,拿到这里来。"
“送到这房里来?"
“是的,我答应了巴特勒船长,他要是睡觉,我就整夜坐在那孩子身边。现在去告诉思嘉小姐吧。省得她再担心了。”
Mammy started off down the hall, her weight shaking the floor, her relieved heart singing “Hallelujah! Hallelujah!” She paused thoughtfully outside of Scarlett’s door, her mind in a ferment of thankfulness and curiosity.
“How Miss Melley done it beyon’ me. De angels fight on her side, Ah specs. Ah’ll tell Miss Scarlett de fune’l termorrer but Ah specs Ah better keep hid dat Miss Melly settin’ up wid Lil Miss. Miss Scarlett ain’ gwine lak dat a-tall.”
嬷嬷动身向穿堂那头走去,笨重的身躯震憾着地板,但她的心里轻松得唱起歌来了。她在思嘉门口沉思地站了一会,脑子里又是感谢又是好奇,那一片紊乱已够她受的了。
“媚兰小姐是怎样胜过我把事情办成的呢?我看天使们都站在她那一边了。我要告诉思嘉小姐明天办葬礼的事,可我想最好把媚兰小姐守着小小姐坐夜的事先瞒着。思嘉小姐根本不会喜欢她这样做呢。”