O how this spring of love resembleth The uncertain glory of an April day; Which now shows all the beauty of the sun, And by and by a cloud takes all away!
SHAKESPEARE
“唉!青春的恋爱就像阴晴不定的四月的天气,太阳的光彩刚刚照耀大地,片刻间就遮上了黑沉沉的乌云一片。”
莎士比亚
Occupied with thoughts of the future and of the singular part which she hoped to play, Mathilde soon came to look back with regret upon the dry, metaphysical discussions which she often had with Julien. Wearied with keeping her thoughts on so high a plane, sometimes also she would sigh for the moments of happiness which she had found in his company; these memories were not untouched by remorse, which at certain moments overwhelmed her.
玛蒂尔德一心想着未来和她希望扮演的独特角色,便很快怀念起她常和于连进行的那些枯燥的、形而上的讨论。如此高超的思想不免令她疲倦,有时候她也怀念起在他身边度过的幸福时刻;这些回忆绝非不含有悔恨,有些时候她确也感到难以忍受。
'But if one has a weakness,' she said to herself, 'it is incumbent upon a girl like myself to forget her duties only for a man of merit; people will not be able to say that it was his handsome moustaches or his elegant seat on a horse that seduced me, but his profound discussions of the future in store for France, his ideas as to the resemblance the events that are going to burst upon us may bear to the Revolution of 1688 in England. I have been seduced,' she answered the voice of remorse, 'I am a weak woman, but at least I have not been led astray like a puppet by outward advantages.
“但是,如果说人人都有弱点,”她对自己说,“仅仅为了一个有才华的人就忘了自己的责任,倒也配得上我这样的女孩子;人家绝不会说,迷住我的是他那漂亮的小胡子和他那骑马的风度而会说是他关于法国前途的深刻议论,他的关于即将降临在我们头上的那些事件可能与英国一六八八年革命相似的种种看法。我已经被迷住了,”她这样回答自己的悔恨,“我是一个软弱的女人,但是我至少没有像一个玩偶被表面的长处弄昏了头。
'If there be a Revolution, why should not Julien Sorel play the part of Roland, and I that of Madame Roland? I prefer that to the part of Madame de Stael: immoral conduct will be an obstacle in our time. Certainly they shall not reproach me with a second lapse; I should die of shame.'
“如果发生一场革命,为什么于连不能扮演罗兰的角色?为什么我不能扮演罗兰夫人的角色?比起德·斯达尔夫人,我更喜欢罗兰夫人,因为行为的不道德,在我们这个时代终将是个障碍。肯定,人们不会指责我再次失足,否则我真会羞死了。”
Mathilde's meditations were not all as grave, it must be admitted, as the thoughts we have just transcribed.
玛蒂尔德的沉思,应该承认,并不总是像我们刚刚写下的这些思想那么严肃。
She would look at Julien, and found a charming grace in his most trivial actions.
她望着于连,觉得他的一举一动都优雅迷人。
'No doubt,' she said to herself, 'I have succeeded in destroying every idea in his mind that he has certain rights.
“毫无疑问,”她对自己说,“我已经在他心里摧毁了他认为他有权利的大大小小一切想法。
'The air of misery and profound passion with which the poor boy addressed those words of love to me a week ago, is proof positive; I must confess that it was extraordinary in me to be vexed by a speech so fervent with respect and passion. Am I not his wife? That speech was only natural, and, I am bound to say, quite agreeable. Julien still loved me after endless conversations, in which I had spoken to him, and with great cruelty, I admit, only of the feelings of love which the boredom of the life I lead had inspired in me for the young men in society of whom he is so jealous. Ah, if he knew how little danger there is in them for me! How lifeless they seem to me when compared with him, all copies of each other.'
“八天前这可怜的孩子跟我说到有关爱情的那句话,当时他那种充满了不幸和激情的神态,充分地证明了这一点;应该承认,我这个人真是少有,听见一句闪烁着那么多敬重、那么多热情的话,居然生气了。我不是他的女人吗?他那样说是很自然的,应该承认,他是很可爱的。在那些没完没了的谈话之后,于连还爱我,而在这些谈话里,我只跟他谈,我得承认,非常残忍地跟他谈我的烦闷生活促使我对上流社会那些他如此嫉妒的年轻人偶尔产生的一点点爱情。啊!但愿他知道他们对我是多么地没有危险!与他相比,我觉得他们多么苍白无力,都是一个照着一个画出来的。”
As she made these reflections, Mathilde was tracing lines with a pencil at random on a page of her album. One of the profiles as she finished it startled and delighted her: it bore a striking resemblance to Julien. 'It is the voice of heaven! This is one of the miracles of love,' she cried in a transport, 'quite unconsciously I have drawn his portrait.'
玛蒂尔德想着想着,信手在她的纪念册上用铅笔涂抹起来。她刚画成的一个侧面像,使她大吃一惊,继而又使她心花怒放:这侧面像和于连惊人地相似。“这是上天的声音!真是一个爱情的奇迹,”她欣喜若狂地叫起来,“我想都没有想,竟画出了他的肖像。”
She fled to her room, locked herself in, set to work, tried seriously to make a portrait of Julien, but could not succeed; the profile drawn at random was still the best likeness. Mathilde was enchanted; she saw in it a clear proof of her grand passion.
她跑回房间,关起门,专心致志,认认真真地想画一幅于连的肖像,可总是画不好;妙手偶成的那幅画始终是最像的;玛蒂尔德非常高兴,从中看出了伟大激情的一个明显证据。
She did not lay aside her album until late in the evening, when the Marquise sent for her to go to the Italian opera. She had only one idea, to catch Julien's eye, so as to make her mother invite him to join them.
直到很晚的时候,侯爵夫人打发人来叫她上意大利歌剧院,她才放下手中的纪念册。她只有一个念头,用眼睛寻找于连,要她母亲邀他陪她们一道去。
He did not appear; the ladies had only the most commonplace people in their box. During the whole of the first act of the opera, Mathilde sat dreaming of the man whom she loved with transports of the most intense passion; but in the second act a maxim of love sung, it must be admitted, to a melody worthy of Cimarosa, penetrated her heart. The heroine of the opera said: 'I must be punished for all the adoration that I feel for him, I love him too well!'
他根本没有露面,在包厢里陪伴女眷的只有几位庸俗之辈。整个第一幕的时间,玛蒂尔德想着她以最强烈的热情爱着的那个人;但是到了第二幕,歌中一句爱情格言钻进了她的心,应该承认,其曲调无愧于契马罗萨,歌剧的女主人公唱道:“应该惩罚我对他的过分崇拜,我爱他爱得太过分了!”
The moment she had heard this sublime cantilena, everything that existed in the world vanished from Mathilde's ken. People spoke to her; she did not answer; her mother scolded her, it was all she could do to look at her. Her ecstasy reached a state of exaltation and passion comparable to the most violent emotions that, during the last few days, Julien had felt for her. The cantilena, divinely graceful, to which was sung the maxim that seemed to her to bear so striking an application to her own situation, occupied every moment in which she was not thinking directly of Julien.Thanks to her love of music, she became that evening as Madame de Renal invariably was when thinking of him. Love born in the brain is more spirited, doubtless, than true love, but it has only flashes of enthusiasm; it knows itself too well, it criticises itself incessantly; so far from banishing thought, it is itself reared only upon a structure of thought.
从她听到这一壮丽的美妙旋律那一刻起,世界上现存的一切对她玛蒂尔德来说都消失了,跟她说话,她不应;母亲责备她,她勉强能够抬眼望望她。她心醉神迷,达到了一种亢奋和激情的状态,可以和于连几天以来为她感到的最猛烈的冲动相比。那句格言所用的美妙旋律宛若仙乐,仿佛与她的心境契合无间,占据了她不曾直接想到于连的那些分分秒秒。由于她喜欢音乐,那天晚上她变得和平时思念于连的德·莱纳夫人一样了。有头脑的爱情无疑比真正的爱情更具情趣,但是它只有短暂的热情;它太了解自己,不断地审视自己;它不会把思想引入歧途,它就是靠思想站立起来的。
On her return home, in spite of anything that Madame de La Mole might say, Mathilde alleged an attack of fever, and spent part of the night playing over the cantilena on her piano. She sang the words of the famous aria which had charmed her:
回到家里,不管德·拉莫尔夫人说什么,玛蒂尔德借口发烧,在钢琴上久久她反复弹奏那段美妙的旋律。她不停地唱使她着迷的那段曲调的歌词。
Devo punirmi, devo punirmi, Se troppo amai.
The result of this night of madness was that she imagined herself to have succeeded in conquering her love. (This page will damage the unfortunate author in more ways than one. The frigid hearts will accuse it of indecency. It does not offer the insult to the young persons who shine in the drawing-rooms of Paris, of supposing that a single one of their number is susceptible to the mad impulses which degrade the character of Mathilde. This character is wholly imaginary, and is indeed imagined quite apart from the social customs which among all the ages will assure so distinguished a place to the civilisation of the nineteenth century.
这个疯狂之夜的结果是,他认为她已经战胜了她的爱情。(这些文字将给不幸的作者带来的损害不止一端。冷酷的人会指责他猥亵。他根本不曾侮辱那些在巴黎的客厅里出风头的年轻女人,因为他并未假定她们中间有任何一个人可能产生败坏玛蒂尔德的性格的那些疯狂的冲动。这个人物完全出自想象,甚至出自社会习俗之外的想象,而正是这些社会习俗将确保十九世纪文明在所有的世纪中占据一个如此卓越的地位。
It is certainly not prudence that is lacking in the young ladies who have been the ornament of the balls this winter.
为这个冬季的舞会增添光彩的那些女孩子们,她们缺少的绝不是谨慎。
Nor do I think that one can accuse them of unduly despising a brilliant fortune, horses, fine properties, and everything that ensures an agreeable position in society. So far from their seeing nothing but boredom in all these advantages, they are as a rule the object of their most constant desires, and if there is any passion in their hearts it is for them.
我也不认为可以指责她们过分地鄙视巨大的财产、车马、上好的土地和可以保证在社会上得到一个舒舒服服的地位的那一切。她们在这些好处中绝非只看到了厌倦,一般来说,这些东西正是最顽强的欲望追求的目标,如果她们心里有激情的话,那就是对这些东西的激情。
Neither is it love that provides for the welfare of young men endowed with a certain amount of talent like Julien; they attach themselves inseparably to a certain set, and when the set 'arrives', all the good things of society rain upon them. Woe to the student who belongs to no set, even his minute and far from certain successes will be made a reproach to him, and the higher virtue will triumph over him as it robs him. Ah, Sir, a novel is a mirror carried along a high road. At one moment it reflects to your vision the azure skies, at another the mire of the puddles at your feet. And the man who carries this mirror in his pack will be accused by you of being immoral! His mirror shows the mire, and you blame the mirror! Rather blame that high road upon which the puddle lies, still more the inspector of roads who allows the water to gather and the puddle to form.
能为于连这样有几分才华的年轻人提供前程的,也绝非爱情,他们紧紧地依附一个小集团,如果小集团发迹,社会上的好东西就纷纷落在他们身上。倒霉的是不属任何小集团的学者,哪怕很不肯定的小小成功也会受到指责,道德高尚者靠偷盗他而声名大振。喂,先生,一部小说是沿着大路往来的一面镜子。它反映到您眼里的,有时是蔚蓝的天空,有时是路上泥潭里的烂泥。而背篓里带着镜子的人将被您指责为不道德!他们镜子照出了污泥,而您却指责镜子!您不如指责有泥潭的大路吧,更不如指责道路检察官,他听任积水形成泥潭。
Now that it is quite understood that the character of Mathilde is impossible in our age, no less prudent than virtuous, I am less afraid of causing annoyance by continuing the account of the follies of this charm ing girl.)
现在我们一致同意,玛蒂尔德的性格在我们这个既谨慎又道德的时代是不可能有的,我继续讲述这个可爱的姑娘的种种疯狂,就不怎么害怕会激起愤慨了。)
Throughout the whole of the day that followed she looked out for opportunities to assure herself that she had indeed conquered her insane passion. Her main object was to displease Julien in every way; but none of her movements passed unperceived by him.
第二天整个白天,她都在找机会确认她已战胜了她那疯狂的激情。她的主要目的是处处让于连不喜欢她,然而又盯着他的一举一动。
Julien was too wretched and above all, too greatly agitated, to interpret so complicated a stratagem of passion, still less could he discern all the promise that it held out to himself: he fell a victim to it; never perhaps had his misery been so intense. His actions were so little under the control of his mind that if some morose philosopher had said to him:'Seek to take advantage rapidly of a disposition which for the moment is favourable to you; in this sort of brainfed love, which we see in Paris,the same state of mind cannot continue for more than a couple of days,' he would not have understood. But, excited as he might be, Julien had a sense of honour. His first duty was discretion; so much he did under stand. To ask for advice, to relate his agony to the first comer would have been a happiness comparable to that of the wretch who, crossing a burning desert, receives from the sky a drop of icecold water. He was aware of the danger, he was afraid of answering with a torrent of tears the indiscreet person who should question him; he closeted himself in his room.
于连太不幸,尤其是太激动,看不破这种如此复杂的爱情诡计,更看不出其中包含的一切对他有利的东西。他反倒成了这种诡计的受害者,也许他的不幸从未如此强烈过。他的行动已经很少受理智的指引,如果有哪位愁眉苦脸的哲人对他说:“赶紧设法利用对您有利的情况吧,在这种巴黎可以见到的有头脑的爱情中,同一种态度不能持续两天以上,”他听了也不会懂。无论他多么狂热,他究竟有荣誉感。他的第一个责任是谨慎,他懂。向随便什么人讨主意,倾诉痛苦,这可能是一种幸福,可以比作一个穿越炎热沙漠的不幸的人,突然从天上接到一滴冰水。他认识到了危险,生怕遇见冒失的人问他,他会泪如泉涌;于是,他把自己关在房里。
He saw Mathilde strolling late and long in the garden; when at length she had left it, he went down there; he made his way to a rose tree from which she had plucked a rose.
他看见玛蒂尔德长时间地在花园里走来走去;她离去以后,他从楼上下来了。他走到一株玫瑰前,她曾经在那儿摘过一朵花。
The night was dark, he could indulge the full extent of his misery without fear of being seen. It was evident to him that Mademoiselle de La Mole was in love with one of those young officers to whom she had been chattering so gaily. He himself had been loved by her, but she had seen how slight were his merits.
夜色阴暗,他可以完全沉浸在不幸之中,不怕被人看见。他觉得很明显,德·拉莫尔小姐爱上了那些年轻军宫中的一位,她刚才还跟他们一起说笑呢。她是爱过他,但是她已经知道他很少长处。
'And indeed, they are slight!' Julien told himself with entire conviction;'I am, when all is said, a very dull creature, very common, very tedious to others, quite insupportable to myself.' He was sick to death of all his own good qualities, of all the things that he had loved with enthusiasm; and in this state of inverted imagination he set to work to criticise life with his imagination. This is an error that stamps a superior person.
“的确,我的长处很少!于连对自己说,深信不疑,“我充其量是个很平常的人,很庸俗,令人生厌,我自己都受不了。”他对他身上所有的优点,对所有他曾经热烈地爱过的那些东西,厌恶得要死;在这种颠倒的想象的状态中,他开始用他的想象来判断人生。这种错误是一个出类拔萃的人的错误。
More than once the idea of suicide occurred to him; this image was full of charm, it was like a delicious rest; it was the glass of icecold water offered to the wretch who, in the desert, is dying of thirst and heat.
他有好几次想到了自杀,那种情景充满了魅力,就像是美妙舒适的休息;那是献给沙漠里快要渴死热死的可怜人的一杯冰水。
'My death will increase the scorn that she feels for me!' he exclaimed.'What a memory I shall leave behind me!'
“我的死会加深她对我的鄙视!”他喊道,“我将留下怎样的回忆啊!”
Sunk into the nethermost abyss of misery, a human being has no resource left but courage. Julien had not wisdom enough to say to himself:'I must venture all'; but as he looked up at the window of Mathilde's room, he could see through the shutters that she was putting out her light: he pictured to himself that charming room which he had seen, alas,once only in his life. His imagination went no farther.
—个人跌进不幸的最后一道深渊,除了勇气,再无别的办法。于连还没有足够的天才能对自己说:“胆子要大。”然而当他望了望玛蒂尔德的房间的窗户时,他透过百叶窗看见她熄灯了,他想象着这间他这一生,唉!只见过一次的可爱的房间,他的想象到此为止。
One o'clock struck; from hearing the note of the bell to saying to himself: 'I am going up by the ladder,' did not take a moment.
一点的钟声响了,他听见了。立刻对自己说:“我用梯子爬上去!”
This was a flash of genius, cogent reasons followed in abundance. 'Can I possibly be more wretched?' he asked himself. He ran to the ladder, the gardener had made it fast with a chain. With the hammer of one of his pocket pistols, which he broke, Julien, animated for the moment by a superhuman force, wrenched open one of the iron links of the chain which bound the ladder; in a few minutes it was free, and he had placed it against Mathilde's window.
真是灵机一动,正当的理由纷纷涌来,“我还能更不幸吗!”他心想。他跑去搬梯子,园丁把梯子锁住了。于连砸下一把小手枪的击铁,这时他有了一股超人的力气,用击铁把链子上的一个链环拧断,不多时他就打走了梯子,靠在了玛蒂尔德的窗子上。
'She will be angry, will heap contempt upon me, what of that? I give her a kiss, a final kiss, I go up to my room and kill myself … ; my lips will have touched her cheek before I die!'
“她要发火了,对我百般蔑视,那有什么关系?我吻她,最后的一吻,然后回我的房间,自杀……我的嘴唇将在我死之前接触到她的脸颊:”
He flew up the ladder, tapped at the shutter; a moment later Mathilde heard him, she tried to open the shutter, the ladder kept it closed. Julien clung to the iron latch intended to hold the shutter open, and, risking a thousand falls, gave the ladder a violent shake, and displaced it a little.Mathilde was able to open the shutter.
他飞也似地爬上梯子,敲百叶窗;过了一会儿,玛蒂尔德听见了,想打开百叶窗,梯子顶住了,于连紧紧抓住用来固定打开的百叶窗的铁钩子,冒着随对摔下去占的危险,猛地一推梯子,令其稍稍挪动。玛蒂尔持终于能打开窗子了。
He flung himself into the room more dead than alive:
他跳进屋子,已经半死不活了。
'So it is you!' she said, and fell into his arms …
“果然是你!她说着投入他的怀抱……
What words can describe the intensity of Julien's happiness?Mathilde's was almost as great.
谁能描写于连的极度的幸福?玛蒂尔德的幸福也差不了多少。
She spoke to him against herself, she accused herself to him.
她对他说自己不好,坦白自己的种种不是。
'Punish me for my atrocious pride,' she said to him, squeezing him in her arms as though to strangle him; 'you are my master, I am your slave, I must beg pardon upon my knees for having sought to rebel.' She slipped from his embrace to fall at his feet. 'Yes, you are my master,' she said again, intoxicated with love and joy; 'reign over me forever, punish your slave severely when she seeks to rebel.'
“惩罚我那残忍的骄傲吧,”她对他说,紧紧地搂住他,他都快喘不过气来了;“你是我的主人,我是你的奴隶,我要跪下求你绕恕,因为我竟然想反抗。”她挣脱他的拥抱,扑倒在地。“是的,你是我的主人,”她对他说,仍旧陶醉在幸福和爱情之中,“永远地主宰我吧,严厉地惩罚你的奴隶吧,如果她想反抗。”
In another moment she had torn herself from his arms, lighted the candle, and Julien had all the difficulty in the world in preventing her from cutting off all one side of her hair.
过了一会儿,她又挣脱他的拥抱,点燃蜡烛,要把整个—边的头发剪下来,于连好说歹说,不让她剪。
'I wish to remind myself,' she told him, 'that I am your servant: should my accursed pride ever make me forget it, show me these locks and say:"There is no question now of love, we are not concerned with the emotion that your heart may be feeling at this moment, you have sworn to obey, obey upon your honour."'
“我要记住,”她对他说,“我是你的奴仆,万一可憎的骄傲让我昏了头,你就把这头发给我看,并且说:‘现在已不再是爱情的问题了,不再是您的心可以有什么感觉的问题了,您曾经发过誓服从,那就以名誉担保服从吧。’”
But it is wiser to suppress the description of so wild a felicity.
迷乱和快乐达到了这种程度,还是略去描写为妙。
Julien's chivalry was as great as his happiness; 'I must go down now by the ladder,' he said to Mathilde, when he saw the dawn appear over the distant chimneys to the east, beyond the gardens. The sacrifice that I am imposing on myself is worthy of you, I am depriving myself of some hours of the most astounding happiness that a human soul can enjoy, it is a sacrifice that I am offering to your reputation: if you know my heart you appreciate the effort that I have to make. Will you always be to me what you are at this moment? But the voice of honour speaks, it is enough. Let me tell you that, since our first meeting, suspicion has not been directed only against robbers. M. de La Mole has set a watch in the garden. M. de Croisenois is surrounded by spies, we know what he is, doing night by night … '
于连的道德感和幸福感并驾齐驱,“我得从梯子上下去,”他对玛蒂尔德说,他已经看见曙光出现在花园东边很远的烟囱上。“我不得不做出的牺牲配得上您,我要放弃几个小时的幸福,那是一个人所能体味的最惊人的幸福。这个牺牲是我为您的名誉做出的,如果您知道我的心,您会明白我对自己的强迫有多么粗暴。您对我将永远是此时此刻的您吗?不过,有名誉担保,足够了。您要知道,自我们第一次相会之后,所有的怀疑并不都是针对小偷的。德·拉莫尔先生在花园里安置了一个看守,德·克鲁瓦绎努瓦先生身边布满了密探,他每天夜里做的事人家全知道……”
When she heard this idea, Mathilde burst out laughing. Her mother and one of the maids were aroused: immediately they called to her through the door. Julien looked at her, she turned pale as she scolded the maid, and did not condescend to speak to her mother.
听到这儿,玛蒂尔刻不禁哈哈大笑,她母亲和一个侍女被惊醒了,突然,她们隔着门跟她说话。于连望着她,她的脸白了,斥责那个侍女,不理她母亲。
'But if it should occur to them to open the window, they will see the ladder!' Julien said to her.
“不过如果她们想到开窗,她们就会看见梯子了!”于连说。
He clasped her once more in his arms, sprang on to the ladder and slid rather than climbed down it; in a moment he was on the ground.
他又一次把她抱在怀里,然后跳上梯子,不是下,简直是滑,一转眼便到了地上。
Three seconds later the ladder was under the lime alley, and Mathilde's honour was saved. Julien, on recovering his senses, found himself bleeding copiously and half naked: he had cut himself in his headlong descent.
三秒钟之后,梯子已被放在小路旁的椴树下,玛蒂尔德的名誉保住了。于连缓过神来,发现自己浑身是血,几乎一丝不挂:他往下滑的时候不留神受伤了。
The intensity of his happiness had restored all the energy of his nature: had a score of men appeared before him, to attack them singlehanded would, at that moment, have been but a pleasure the more. Fortunately, his martial valour was not put to the proof: he laid down the ladder in its accustomed place; he replaced the chain that fastened it; he did not for get to come back and obliterate the print which the ladder had left in the border of exotic flowers beneath Mathilde's window.
极度的幸福完全恢复了他的性格的力量:如果此刻他孤身面对二十个人,不过是又给他添一桩乐事罢了。幸好他的武德没有受到考验,他把梯子放回原处,重新用铁链锁上。玛蒂尔德窗下那方种着奇花异草的花坛里留下了梯子的痕迹,他也没有忘记回去除掉。
As in the darkness he explored the loose earth with his hand, to make sure that the mark was entirely obliterated, he felt something drop on his hand; it was a whole side of Mathilde's hair which she had clipped and threw down to him.
黑暗中,于连用手在松软的土上摸来摸去,看看痕迹是否除干净了。他觉得有什么东西落在手上,原来是玛蒂尔德整个一边的头发,她剪下来扔给他的。
She was at her window.
她在窗口。
'See what your servant sends you,' she said in audible tones, 'it is the sign of eternal obedience. I renounce the exercise of my own reason; be my master.'
“这是你的奴仆送给你的,”她对他说,声音相当大,“这是永远服从的标志。我不要理智了,做我的主人吧。”
Julien, overcome, was on the point of fetching back the ladder and mounting again to her room. Finally reason prevailed.
于连被打败了,又要去拿梯子,爬到她屋里去,然而,最强的还是理智。
To enter the house from the garden was by no means easy. He succeeded in forcing the door of a cellar; once in the house he was obliged to break open, as silently as possible, the door of his own room. In his confusion he had left everything behind, including the key, which was in the pocket of his coat. 'Let us hope,' he thought, 'that she will remember to hide all that corpus delicti!'
从花园回到府邸,也不是一件容易的事。他把一间地下室的门撞开了,到了府中,他不得不尽可能轻地撬开他的房门。他离开那间小屋那么匆忙,慌乱中连装在衣服口袋里的钥匙都忘了。“但愿她想到把那些丢下的东西一一藏好!”
Finally exhaustion overpowered happiness, and, as the sun rose, he fell into a profound slumber.
最后,疲乏战胜了幸福,太阳也升起来了,他沉入黑甜的梦乡。
The luncheon bell just succeeded in waking him, he made his appearance in the dining-room. Shortly afterwards, Mathilde entered the room.Julien's pride tasted a momentary joy when he saw the love that glowed in the eyes of this beautiful creature, surrounded by every mark of deference; but soon his prudence found an occasion for alarm.
午餐的铃声好不容易才把他叫醒,他来到餐厅。很快,玛蒂尔德也来了。看到这个如此美丽、如此受尊敬的女人眼中闪烁着绵绵的情意,于连的骄傲得到很大的满足,然而很快,他的谨慎被惊动了。
On the pretext of not having had time to dress her hair properly, Mathilde had so arranged it that Julien could see at a glance the whole extent of the sacrifice that she had made for him in clipping her locks that night. If anything could have spoiled so lovely a head, Mathilde would have succeeded in spoiling hers; all one side of those beautiful pale golden locks were cropped to within half an inch of her scalp.
玛蒂尔德推说时间少,不能好好梳头,她把头发弄得让于连一眼就能看见,她夜里剪掉头发,为他做出的牺牲何等巨大,假使一张如此美丽的脸能够被什么东西破坏的话,玛蒂尔德是做到了。她那美丽的、略带灰色的金发整个一边几被剪掉,只剩下半寸长。
At luncheon, Mathilde's whole behaviour was in keeping with this original imprudence. You would have said that she was deliberately trying to let everyone see the insane passion that she had for Julien. Fortunately, that day, M. de La Mole and the Marquise were greatly taken up with a list of forthcoming promotions to the Blue Riband, in which the name of M. de Chaulnes had not been included. Towards the end of the meal, Mathilde in talking to Julien addressed him as 'my master'. He coloured to the whites of his eyes.
吃中饭时,玛蒂尔德的态度完全与这头一宗不谨慎相应。幸好这一天德·拉莫尔先生和侯爵夫人的心思全在颁发蓝绶带这件事上,名单里没有德·肖纳先生。到了快吃完饭的时候,玛蒂尔德跟于连说话,竟称他“我的主人”。他连眼白都红了。
Whether by accident or by the express design of Madame de La Mole, Mathilde was not left alone for an instant that day. In the evening, however, as she passed from the dining-room to the drawing-room, she found an opportunity of saying to Julien:
或是偶然,或是德·拉莫尔夫人故意安排,玛蒂尔德这一天没有一刻一个人的时候。晚上从餐厅到客厅去,她终于找到点空儿跟于连说:
'I hope you do not think that it is my idea: Mamma has just decided that one of her maids is to sleep in my room.'
“您会认为这是我的借口吗?妈妈刚决定让她的一个女仆住到我的套房里来。”
The day passed like lightning; Julien was on the highest pinnacle of happiness. By seven o'clock next morning he was installed in the library; he hoped that Mademoiselle de La Mole would deign to appear there; he had written her an endless letter.
这一天过得快如闪电。于连幸福到了极点。第二天早上刚七点,他就坐在了图书室;他希望德·拉莫尔小姐肯来,他给她写了一封长长的信。
He did not see her until several hours had passed, at luncheon. Her head was dressed on this occasion with the greatest pains; a marvelous art had been employed to conceal the gap left by the clipped locks. She looked once or twice at Julien, but with polite, calm eyes; there was no longer any question of her calling him 'my master'.
他几个钟头以后才看见她,是吃午饭的时候。这一天,她非常细心地梳了头,极其巧妙地遮掩住头发被剪掉的地方。她瞟了于连一、两眼,但是目光礼貌而平静,“我的主人”这称呼也不提了。
Julien could not breathe for astonishment … Mathilde found fault with herself for almost everything that she had done for him.
于连惊讶得喘不过气……玛蒂尔德几乎责备自己为他所做的一切。
On mature reflection, she had decided that he was a creature, if not altogether common, at any rate not sufficiently conspicuous to deserve all the strange follies which she had ventured to commit for him. On the whole, she no longer thought of love; she was tired of love that day.
她深思熟虑之后,断定他即便不完全是个常人,至少也不够超群,不配她大着胆子做出那些奇特的疯狂之举。总之,她不大想爱情了,这一天,她已倦于恋爱了。
As for Julien, the emotions of his heart were those of a boy of sixteen.Harrowing doubt, bewilderment, despair, seized upon him by turns during this luncheon, which seemed to him to be everlasting.
于连呢,他的心翻腾得象个十六岁的孩子。这顿午饭似乎永远也吃不完,可怕的怀疑,惊讶,绝望,轮番折磨他。
As soon as he could decently rise from table, he flew rather than ran to the stable, saddled his horse himself and was off at a gallop; he was afraid of disgracing himself by some sign of weakness. 'I must kill my heart by physical exhaustion,' he said to himself as he galloped through the woods of Meudon. 'What have I done, what have I said to deserve such disgrace?
他一旦能不失礼貌地离开餐桌,就立即不是跑而是冲向马厩,自己动手给马装上鞍子,跃马飞奔而去,他怕心一软坏了名誉。“我必须用肉体的疲劳来扼杀我的心灵,”他对自己说,一边在莫东森林里狂奔。“我做了什么,说了什么,竟遭此不幸?”
'I must do nothing, say nothing today,' he decided as he returned to the house, 'be dead in body as I am in spirit. Julien no longer lives, it is his corpse that is still stirring.'